Everyone choses buds at the florist's because they think they will bloom tomorrow...in their arms. The flowers are already full, left matured, left complete. They will wither tomorrow, their petals lying here and there. Soft, yet so unwanted...so uncared for. No one wants the flowers therefore, because someone else has flowered them, someone else has made them bloom.
I have often complained about not having love in my life. I had forgotten or rather never realised that I was never taken because someone else had made me bloom already. Not a kiss, never a hug, not even a touch and yet he had flowered me...possibly with his pain! And then somewhere along the roads of life, he dropped me, flowered and yet his love making my existance so beautiful. I was picked up by a kind man...an emodiment of all that is good, just and beautiful in this world. He put me in a vase, safe, protected...and I thought maybe I am yet to bloom. Perhaps yes, perhaps no, perhaps I am going to scatter in petals and he is going to throw me away, to make place for a fresh bud. But I hope my petals, dry they maybe, shall reach the grave of my love.

I see her everyday...walking with her two little kids. Down the road she goes...I have even seen where she lives! She is just another woman, barely 28...and yet there is something about her that makes me think so deeply about her...i don't know what! Every time I look at her, she seems so different. I wonder the kind of childhood she probably has had, I wonder the kind of relationship she has with her husband, I wonder how she felt when she became a mother, I wonder what she thinks of life, of God, if she has ever loved and lost...I want to peer into her innermost thoughts and all i get is a mere glance! And yet...she makes me think...she makes me wonder...Does she feel loved when the wind blows into her face? Does she get filled up with the fragrance of fresh flowers? Does she look at the moon every night and get mesmerized by its beauty? Does she try drowning her troubles in the ocean? Does she feel insignificant beneath the blue sky? Does she write poetry to express her passion, her love? Does she still remember the first day she kissed, the first time she made love, the first time she heard her baby breathe? Does she remember the first time she felt like a woman?
I see her in the black veil that she uses, to hide herself from the world...that the only man in her life has so lovingly wrapped her with...the veil that only he takes off every night to behold what is so precious to him...to love the one who so belongs to him, to love the one who has borne all the pain to bring his little children into the world. And I feel these tears swelling up somewhere, not in my eyes...my somewhere deep in my heart! What if i were her and she was me? What if...

Sometimes we try running away from things that mean the most to us...probably because we are afraid to lose them forever! We get so tied up trying to live up to the expectations of society that we start ignoring our own self...just because we want to be socially acceptable...just because we are too scared to stand up for what we hold precious!

I wait in the cold embrace of the night...the moon light falling on my empty bed! and i wait for his voice to fill me...to leave no space for anything else...anything at all! He acts as if he doesn't care...as if nothin matters...but his eyes betray him...they betray him all the time!!!
How i want to tell him all that he means to me...but i don't want him to vanish into the night! How i want to let him know that he is all i have! how i want to call myself his...how i want to tell him that i belong to him! that i am no one wthout him! every night when that fills me up for seconds...i wnat time to freeze...i want God to watch...the mingling of two souls that are ordained to live alone...to die alone...

kaise kahen key humey bhi jaagti raatein mili
unko toh yehi shikwa hai key humein neend kyu aati hai
- Shakeeb

As I see the sun drown into the horizon,
Leaving behind the tiny specs of pink in the sky,
I drink the last remains of red,
Its beauty mesmerizing me…I sigh!

A thousand thoughts enveloping my mind,
A thousand memories to cherish,
A thousand things that I wanted to tell you,
But I wish there were another thousand till I perish.

I remember the first time your voice I had heard,
It still echoes in my head.
And the time when you had said you love me,
O I can die to hear that before I am dead!

The feathery wind touches my face gently,
And it reminds me so much of you.
Your touch, your breath, your gentleness,
And of all the times I had spent with you!

I remember the moments of pain and despair,
The day you walked away,
I too wanted you to find love, my love,
So couldn’t possibly ask you to stay.

And the nights of emptiness I have spent
Trying to forget you,
Trying to believe my love didn’t exist,
Trying to believe I didn’t love you.

But today I no more fear myself, my love,
For no more shall I be,
Dust to dust and ashes to ashes…I shall go
But my love shall be with you even after me!

As I close my eyes in silence
I feel you wrap your arms around me,
And you know what, I am scared no more,
And never will I be!

I can feel your body embrace me,
Your lips sealing mine…
I can feel you breathing into me,
Unbound by space and time!

If this is the end, tomorrow shall be a better day,
This moment has at last taken my breath away!


Somewhere far away, a stray tear trickles down
Unaware of its reason of being, its identity!
Only to be lost forever…
In the oceans of eternity!